2: A Momentous Rejoining
Olga, seventy-four in 1965 when I first met her, had come from Yorkshire, via Birmingham, to Vancouver as a young adult with her family in 1910. In due course she married and gave birth to her son, Robert. During the 1920s she attended St Mary’s Anglican Church in Kerrisdale, where she was also the personal assistant to the Rector. They shared many ideals about Christianity and established a close spiritual affinity. After several years she and her husband moved to another area and she lost contact with the Rector, but only at the physical level. He had become ill, largely as a result of his own perceptions about spirituality becoming increasingly at odds with the church, and therefore had taken early retirement. Meanwhile, her own awakening to the realities of the spirit world had been progressing — largely unsought but always inspiring confidence that those who were in charge of her spiritual development were under Christ authority and empowerment.
There was a cordial, easy rapport between Olga and me from the first moments that began a years-long association based on our mutual interest in matters to do with eternal truth, mystical/spiritual experience and love for the living Jesus.
She had had many manifestations of Jesus and others from the Realms of Light
Olga had experienced many manifestations and one-to-one personal awarenesses of Jesus and others from the Realms of Light — including the man who introduced himself to her as her Teacher — over decades, and she had kept faithful, written records of most of these. These contacts affirmed the experience of reincarnation both verbally and more comprehensively by events in which Olga was either taken out of the body or entered into a state that she described as the dual consciousness, in which she was aware of both her physical surroundings and body and her soul body — which was having its own, different experience — at the same time.
In 1940 she was taken out of the body by the Teacher to a place like a chalet on a mountainside where the Rector, newly and prematurely passed over, sat in a contemplative state. The Teacher told Olga that the Rector was feeling a great sense that his life had been a failure, and all his desires for bringing awareness of, and love for, the Lord Jesus to his fellows in the Earth life had been to little avail. The Teacher said that he needed reassurance which Olga would be able to give him, and that he would be able to see and talk with her, but not the Teacher. She went to him and they spoke for some while, although she brought through to her waking consciousness no recollection of what had been said. Afterwards, the Teacher told her that her words would be carefully considered by the Rector and, in due course, be beneficial to his going forward.
This indeed proved to be so and before long the Rector came to thank Olga for her assistance and tell her that he had now become closely associated with the Teacher, as his student of the eternal realities of Life, as was the case with Olga but he in the etheric and she in the incarnate realm.
Olga later told me that in October 1943 the Rector had visited her during the night, carrying a tiny baby in his arms, which he presented to her. She had had no idea of the meaning of this experience at the time but I had been conceived about then and it was very evident that he had been responsible for bringing me to the Bible Bookshop and getting her book into my hands, ultimately leading to the crossing — or, more accurately, converging — of our paths. In a sense, therefore, it could be said that he had fulfilled this prophetic visit of 1943 some twenty-two years later by arranging the circumstances of my meeting with Olga.
During my association with Olga in the mid-1960s our relationship developed into one whereby we had the mutual perception that she was to me ‘Godmother Park’; and in a similar fashion, I felt very much that the Rector was my ‘spirit-world Godfather’. I quickly developed a very palpable sense of his presence and his particular vibration, often announced by seeing with my inner eye the colour of his personal life-energy — a pale, beryl green. Most evenings there would be telephone conversation between Olga and me and I would often see him listening in, or if not actually see him, smell aromatic pipe tobacco.
The first time this happened I asked Olga if the Rector had smoked a pipe during his earthly life and she said, “Yes; how did you know?” Although he had laid aside his earthly body before I had incarnated, I felt a great sense of his closeness and solicitousness for my well-being, and this engendered in me an abiding love for this deeply sincere, gentle, caring and loving man. He was always there for me in times of need or doubt, as well as of joy and celebration, but never intrusively so. In due course he became for me ‘the Stalwart’, and it is by this nickname that I have often lovingly spoken of and with him.
Olga spoke so matter-of-factly to me about Jesus as being a real, living, ‘today’, personal presence in her life; how his love, wisdom, guiding, understanding and protection were so uplifting, restoring, inspiring. No-one in church had ever spoken this way, and I wanted more. I couldn’t get enough. I visited on Friday straight from work until the small hours, Sunday from early afternoon until late, and often midweek straight from work until the small hours, practically every week. I bombarded her with questions about psychic, spiritual, eternal, mystical, metaphysical, esoteric matters endlessly, and she patiently, lovingly, diligently answered. I soaked-up her words of wisdom like a sponge.
Olga told me some time after our first meeting that as soon as she had closed the door upon my departure on that occasion, the Master immediately said to her, Speak of me freely and unreservedly to the young man; and so that he return again and again, I will fill his heart with joy beyond the pleasures of Earth. I can affirm that she did, I did and he did!
She had a prayer sanctuary at the cottage and at the end of each visit I went to it with her for prayers. She prayed so easily, spontaneously, conversationally. My prayers were rehearsed, stilted, stumbling. My heart was sincere but my mouth didn’t know how to adequately express the desire of my heart. Hearing her speak so fluidly about Jesus as the living Lord, active in a palpable, tangible, purposeful way in her life and in the life of any who sincerely desired it, caused me to grow to love Jesus in a way and with a depth that the church had not been able to do. This became an all-consuming passion for me; I wanted to experience Jesus in my life in the same way Olga clearly was doing.
One night in the autumn of 1966, at her sanctuary prayer table before home-time, Olga said to me, “The Master is here and he is speaking to me a message for you. I will repeat it to you and you can speak with him direct. Any reply he gives, I will relay to you. He is saying to you, What is your desire? ”
I was considerably intimidated at this experience of him, whom I had always understood to be the Lord of Life, the King of Love, the Prince of Peace, the Son of God, speaking to me and indeed asking a question that I thought might land me in difficulty if I could not come up with the ‘right’ answer. Not that he appeared to be speaking in a threatening way, but this was, after all, it seemed to me, the ‘boss’, and one needed to have the right answers for the boss or there might be trouble. So my naiveté and the doctrines of the church had led me to believe.
I said, very hesitatingly, “To serve you, according to your will” , or words to that effect. It was a vague and non-specific statement because I had no specific answer to the question, but I believed the whole objective of ‘service’ was to do the Will or bidding of the Supreme Being and/or His Anointed Messenger, whatever that Will might be.
His reply was surprising to my young, inexperienced ears (can ears be inexperienced? You know what I mean):
That is not the purpose of your life and being on Earth. You have come into this world bringing with you potential for accomplishing certain things. My purpose is to assist you and guide you in discovering what your potential is so that it might be developed and fulfilled in your earthly life. Consider this carefully, my son, so that you may become aware of this and grow in your understanding of it, that in the fullness of time you may bear much fruit according to that inward desire and potential.
That, at any rate, was the gist of his response and that gist has remained with me over the years. Here was Jesus, the Exalted One, saying that his job was to assist me. I had never heard anyone in the church say anything like this. It was startling in its contrast to all my previous understandings of the relationship of us ‘mortal’ folk to Jesus, the Christ of God. And yet, somehow, this explanation made so much sense that I could find no argument with it. When you think about it, he is much better equipped to help us than we, him. It was a landmark for me and really cemented my commitment to sticking close to Olga, because this was really ‘where it was at’. She had a direct line to Jesus and this was ample evidence of that.
My visits to her cottage continued. She seemed to be a fount of spiritual wisdom, and it was mother’s milk to my soul. Her speaking about Jesus cultivated in me a desire to experience his livingness as she experienced it. To me, it had become one thing to know about him, read about what he said and did, the way he won people’s lives, loyalty and devotion in the long ago, and to accept and live, or desire to live, according to his example and the teachings recorded of him in the Gospel accounts. But for me that was like falling in love with some film actress or other, distant, remote person, with whom there could be no touching, holding, exchange of loving expression; no consummation of one’s heart’s desire for experiencing the energy, the aura, the living spirit, the vibration of the pulsing, dynamic Life Force of that person. I craved all of this with Jesus; to have a truly personal, intimate, meaningful relationship with him became my all-consuming, active, aching desire.
In my basement lodgings every night I would kneel at my bedside and open my heart to him; tell him of my love for him, my yearning desire to experience his livingness in my life; close, tender, loving, guiding, whatever… but real to me as distinct from second-hand accounts of someone else’s experience of him.
This must have gone on night after night for months; I do not recall now how long but I do recall very clearly the aching in my heart and soul for this and how it grew until it was almost beyond endurance. Then, on January 24th 1967, after my nightly outpouring, I began to prepare for bed. As I stood in the middle of the room, suddenly he was there, in the corner, manifested, superimposed in the place where stood a beechwood chest of drawers with a mirror on top. He was in the midst of an aura of golden, living sunlight, which radiated out from him more than an arm’s length in all directions. He was about three or four paces from me.
As I became aware of his presence he began to move toward me. It was not a walking movement. He seemed to be above the floor a few inches, and he glided. The movement was relatively slow, certainly unhurried, but as he drew nearer he began to speak. I heard him with my ears, I experienced his speaking with my soul, with my heart; every cell in my body and every fibre of my being experienced his speaking. There was no part of my being that did not hear him. And every part of my being understood with a total certainty the meaning, at a soul-knowing level rather than an intellectual-knowing level of understanding, what was the true, mystical meaning of those words. The words that he spoke were, I discovered later, from Revelation chapter 3 vs. 20:Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.
To the best of my knowledge I had not read or heard those words before — so I discovered later — but at that moment they were a timeless part of my being and I knew exactly what they meant because his imparting to me of the words also imbued my mind with the meaning and understanding of them — his meaning of them. By the time he had finished speaking he had reached less than an arm’s length from where I was standing. His aura of golden, living sunlight had enveloped me, and the feeling of Love — of agapé — to my being was so intense, so powerful, so uplifting to my spirit that I felt as if my heart had grown to the size of a football and was going to burst out of my chest cavity. This feeling of all-pervasive, all-inclusive Love was complete, permeating not just my body but my entire aura in an orgasm of the soul, immeasurably more intense than any such physical experience. I was blinded by a waterfall of joyful, rapturous tears and every part of me was alive, electrified as never before.
His presence was visible in the midst of the light of his aura, which was at least as bright as the sun but did not hurt my eyes at all. With me now fully enveloped by his aura, he stopped. His eyes were radiating the all-knowing wisdom of the ages, and Love; personal Love as well as universal, unconditional Love. I knew he Loved me personally, in a way and with a Love that is utterly beyond any love I had ever known, heard about or experienced in this world. He embraced me; not with his physical arms but with every part of his being — with his total, unconditional, intimate, penetrating, all-encompassing, all-pervasive Love.
I was a quivering jelly. Not from fear (how could fear exist in such an exquisitely beautiful, magnificent encounter?) but from being overwhelmed by the power of his Love. The moment of this embrace seemed to be timeless but was probably a few seconds of Earth-time. I remember reading at some later date, in the book of Revelation, chapter 1 vs. 16, …and his countenance was as the sun shineth in his strength, and saying to myself, ‘That is an exact and perfect description of his appearance.’
Then the manifestation gradually withdrew and disappeared from my sight. But the power and sense of his presence that was left with me, in me, lasted for at least an hour, probably two. I have never taken any form of hallucinogenic or consciousness-expanding drug, but I have no shred of doubt that this feeling was a ‘high’ beyond that capable of being induced by any such substance. I had to physically restrain myself from rushing — more like flying — upstairs, outside, onto the rooftops and calling to all the world, “He’s REAL! He’s really REAL!” even though by this time it was well after midnight.
Eventually I slept.
Next morning I could hardly wait to phone Olga, and could barely contain my excitement as I exclaimed, “Something really wonderful has happened; I simply must come and see you straight away after work today!”
I’m sure she must have been on tenterhooks all day waiting to find out what could possibly have happened to be as exciting as my voice must have conveyed. I know my excitement all day was almost uncontainable. I never at any time said anything to any of my work colleagues, but some few weeks later my boss strolled up the lane with me one lunch hour on our way for a bite to eat together and, to my amazement, very hesitantly he said, “You have really changed recently, Brian; you’ve become so …” , he searched for a word to express his meaning, “so… spiritual.”
I forget how the rest of that conversation went but he appeared to have a sense of awe about him toward the change he discerned in me.
That evening, January 25th, I must have driven at breakneck speed to the cottage and burst in, no doubt like a whirlwind, to Olga. I blurted out the news and described the whole experience, including what the Master had said to me. She became very excited, and to my surprise said, “This is a message.”
“I know it’s a message,” I said, probably sounding slightly irritated at what appeared to be a statement of the obvious.
“No, you don’t understand,” she said. “This is a message not just for you, but a message also for me,” and she became even more excited. “There is something I have never told you. Not because I didn’t think about telling you, but because I was never authorised to tell you. But this experience of yours is a message of authorisation to me, to tell you all about this. Now is the time.”
She went on to explain that many years ago, after years of contact from, and counselling by, the visitor from spirit who had introduced himself to her as her Teacher, he came to her one night and took her out of the body to a place in spirit that resembled a temple or cathedral.
There, before a gathering of a good many witnesses from the Realms of Light, including the Lord Jesus himself, he had instructed her in a form of Service of Holy Communion. He had spoken the words, shown her gestures of the arms and hands, shown her when to stand, when to kneel, when to face toward the altar of Lights and of Bread and Wine of partaking (signifying the addressing of the words the Teacher had given her to speak to the Source of All) and when to face away from it (signifying the addressing of the words to — and the inclusion of — others present, whether in the Earth life or beyond).
He showed her how to take the bread and consecrate it by blessing and breaking it, just as Jesus did at the Last Supper, and the words to speak in accompaniment to the actions. He did the same for the consecrating of the ‘fruit of the vine’. He gave her words and actions for the partaking of the sanctified bread and non-fermented ‘wine’ (grape juice) and for the partaking of the same on behalf of and as an offering to others, whether incarnate or discarnate, who ‘seek after the Light of the Sanctuary of Christ Communion, and of all who have desired our prayers’.
There was much, much more. He explained to her that this was to be, for her, at least for the time being, a solitary communion at the Earth-life conscious level; that it was and would become for her a Mystical Communion with Christ. He said the spirit light generated by the sincerity of her heart, through the uplifting energies created during the service, would attract many from the realms beyond Earth who were lost in dark and dismal places — the ‘Wilderness’ — who would find spiritual solace in this celebration event, as well as many from the Realms of Light who were in at-one-ment with its message and the desire conveyed by its words and symbolic gestures.
It was an act of attunement with the heart and mind of the living Jesus.
But the central purpose and objective of the ritual in which the Teacher instructed her was that it was to be an exercise in unifying the focus of the heart and mind of the communicant in an act of attunement with the mind and spirit of the living Jesus. The words of the ritual were assembled mostly from the words of King David (Psalms), Isaiah, Jesus (the Gospels), Paul and John of Patmos (Revelation), and linked into a cohesive, structured, progressive format by words given by the Teacher during this out-of-body instruction. There were also inspirational hymns included to add to the conduciveness of getting on a spiritually attuned, Christ-Mind wavelength.
The ritual was designed to enable the communicant to gradually ascend to a place of refined, uplifted attunement, and then to enter into a period of silent communion of heart and mind with the heart and mind of the living Jesus. This is to develop the faculty — dormant in those who have become so engaged in the ‘sojourning in time’ part of their lives that their physical and spiritual worlds are not in a resonant state of peace, harmony and balance with each other — of entering into the within part of their mind, where they will have awareness of and fellowship with the Anointed Messenger of the Holy One. This will bring enlightenment and illumination of the eternal realities, of which Jesus is Master, for the uplifting of all who truly seek after God and earnestly desire the Kingdom of Heaven on Earth.
The communicant can speak with Jesus in their mind and have pen and paper ready for writing his response, which comes into their mind as objectively spoken words; a form of communication described by Olga as the silent voice, and which I have latterly come to term Mind-to-mind communing.
Olga explained to me that the words spoken to me by the Master in my basement room were also part of the Service in which she had been instructed. These words are the Master’s invitation to all who respond to his knocking at the door of their inner awareness, so that he may enter into their lives and have spiritual fellowship, or ‘supping’ with them of the Bread, symbol of Eternal Life, and the Wine, symbol of perfect, unconditional, Spiritual Love. This was his message to her that I was ready to be instructed by her in the order and meaning of this Service of Mystical Christ Communion.
This she diligently did, and from then I went to her cottage every Sunday morning to participate with her in these Communion Devotions. She explained to me that this was an earthly manifestation of a heavenly ‘Society of the Mystical Communion of Christ’ or SMCC and it was to have no earthly organisational structure or rules or regulations. It was intended as a focus to assist ‘all who will’ to enter into a state of at-one-ment with the great desire-thought of Jesus — namely, the Kingdom of Heaven on Earth.
This was intended to be a solitary or near-solitary activity, in accordance with Jesus’ own teachings that we should enter into our closet and when we are alone, to then pray (Mt. 6:6), and also when two or three are gathered together in his name that he would be there ‘in the midst’ with them (Mt. 18:20). There would never be any outward, organised, institutionalised manifestations of it that could be usurped, manipulated, distorted or perverted for the self-serving ways of those who did not have a heart first and foremost for the Truth of Eternity and the Kingdom of Heaven on Earth.
This, at last, was what my heart had been craving since I had first begun seeking in the ‘outer court of the temple’ — the church of earthly consciousness — in which gathered multitudes of souls without the light of spiritual discernment. Now at last I felt as if I had been brought to the very entranceway to the ‘inner court of the temple’, which would enable me to move into a state or place of true and meaningful communion with the King of Love, the Prince of Peace, the Lord of Life; Jesus of Nazareth, the mystical, Anointed Messenger of the Holy One, the great I AM.
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